Tuesday 8 December 2009

You, your partner and money...

How many are there in your relationship? Call me conventional, but I'm guessing it's just you and your partner. But maybe there are times when you feel that other issues - things you don't want to talk about - make their presence felt in an almost tangible way.

Christmas can be a difficult time both for your relationship and your finances. There are so many expectations - from the time you spend together (when doing what you normally do for the rest of the year doesn't seem enough) to how much you'll spend (in general, on yourself and on each other) - that it's not surprising it can all feel like a bit of a let-down.

Minor rows about spending and cash can easily become magnified. And if you're worried about debts that you haven't told your partner about, it will only make things worse.

There's no shortcut to non-stop peace and goodwill, but it's important to acknowledge that people who are close to you may have different ideas about money. If your partner was influenced by how he (or she) saw money being managed by their parents, they may not even question why they view money in the way they do.

It's not often that you get together with someone who has the same views about life as you do. In fact, if you do, it can be a bit dull. And you certainly don't have the same ideas about money for your relationship or your finances to thrive.

But it's important that you're able to deal with your differences and that means that you have to be able to talk about them. It's the only way you can work out what's important to each of you financially and what you need to do - together and separately - to reach keep your finances on track while keeping disagreements to a minimum. Just make sure you don't start a conversation about your financial future following an afternoon of working your way through a bottle of Baileys...